my first

so its my first blog im not really sure what to write i dont really have much experience with all this but what im looking for is a place to vent, let my feelings and tired thoughts relieve my mind i have so many thoughts and emotions going through me and its so hard to talk about them to friends and family without seeming extremely self centered which is most definitely not my style, i feel like even if no one ever reads this its ok i just need to let some stuff go. So im a young woman who pretends to be so in tuned and in control of my life when in reality it is the complete opposite. despite the several mishaps that have greatly impacted my life i think it all started when my dad was incarcerated when i was a baby leaving my mom all alone to fend for us was way too difficult and she always did her best i wouldn't say i had a bad childhood but it was a short one for sure being the only child in our low income household was difficult i really just wanted to make my mother proud i always felt i had to grow up fast and i did but Ive always had the philosophy everything happens for a reason and i think that is the truth because me growing up early helped a lot later on in my life I'm so grateful i had without a doubt the best mom ever better yet the best friend i ever could have asked for she was caring understanding and out of this world funny, always laughing and making jokes took the edge off of our situation. so my mom was one of those moms who didn't hide anything intuitively blunt, during my early years she decided to tell me about my fathers other life, and I'm not talking about the Schizophrenic double life, my father had a whole separate family he left behind in Mexico. apparently i have a half sister who is ten years older than i who lives in Mexico, it was so weird knowing i had a sibling who knew nothing about me, i felt ashamed like i was some secret oh wait i was...